Monday, September 17, 2018

Making the world a better place, one apology at a time

Every year right before Yom Kippur, I send out an an e-mail to all my friends and relatives scattered across the country (or around the world) to apologize for anything I may have done to offend them, and to forgive them for any slights they've made against me.  

And while I have written about doing this before, this year's message was a bit different, brought on by things I've been observing now for a while and find quite troubling. 

So now I'd like to share my message with everyone here in the hopes that you too will take it to heart, and will join with me in making the world a better place... 

An Apology...


It is that time of year again where I need to send out my usual Yom Kippur apology letter. But this time as I forgive all who may have offended or wronged me, and beg for forgiveness for any hurt I may have caused – knowingly or unknowingly – over the last 12 months, I’d like to ask all of you all a favor.

I'd like to do it a bit as I forgive all who may have offended or wronged me, and beg for forgiveness for any hurt I may have caused – knowingly or unknowingly – over the last 12 months, I’d like to ask all of you all a favor.

I’d like you all to consider joining me in making amends with everyone you know, whether you celebrate Yom Kippur or not.

I ask this of you because I’ve been noticing a hardening of hearts in our society and a slide toward intolerance of those who don’t agree with us or our opinions.

It has made the world a meaner place and made it acceptable to purposefully hurt another person with little regard for anyone’s feelings but our own.

This, of course, runs contrary to the spirit of Yom Kippur, where Jews around the world are not only supposed to atone for their sins against G-d, but must also seek forgiveness from others who we might have wronged over the last year. As it is written in the Talmud, a collection of writings that covers centuries of Jewish law and tradition:

For sins between man and G-d Yom Kippur atones, but for sins between a one and one’s fellow, Yom Kippur does not atone until one appeases one’s fellow.
So, in addition to my usual litany of apologies I make to you every year, I’d like to add this:

If I have been less tolerant or dismissive of your views and/or opinions, I apologize and promise to try and be more understanding of them in this coming year. I also promise to try and realize that I do NOT need to prove your beliefs and opinions are wrong just to justify my own. Nor do I need to prove you wrong just to delude myself that I am somehow morally superior to you, because only G-d can make that judgement, not me.

I further apologize if I offended you in my zeal and perhaps self-righteousness  to support those causes I believe in.

I ask you all to join me in making this apology to everyone you know, because another part of the Yom Kippur tradition is Tikkun Olam – which means doing an act that “repairs the world.”

I know that making an apology doesn’t seem like it can make a big difference in the world. But it could make a small difference to our little part of it. And just imagine the kind of change that could happen if everyone decided to repair their small corner of the world.

Perhaps then we could live up to the potential for good that G-d gave to all of us and earn our place in the book of life for another happy and healthy new year.

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